D.E.A.R.E.S.T

Dear blog..

I started to feel that the existence of her doesn't affect me at all.

Whether she is here or she is at other places, i dont really bother.

But at times, i do think that the existence of her is important to me.

I'm confused. I dont know which one is the truth.

Sometimes i love her. And sometimes i juz dont.

Does anyone faced the same prob as mine?

Lately, i felt as if i'm far away from her. I treated her indifferently. 
Whats wrong with me?? Was it because i already forget about her? 
It cant be. No. It cant. She's in my mind. Always.

Or.. Was it because i'm bored with her? Was that the main cause??
If yes..Then the relationship that i've built with her is 
merely the same as others.

Maybe i'm tired to be the one who always start it first.
Feel as if i'm the one who is over excited. Whereas she doesnt.
So..I decided to follow her rhythm.
"U didnt call me. So i dont call u.
U didnt text me. So i dont text u.
U need me only when u need me. So i'll do the same thing to u."
Fair and square right??

U are such an egoist Lee.
I'm not egoist.. I'm juz tired. 
I'm tired to take care of my heart every time i got hurt.
I'm tired.. Seriously..